Single in the City : Adventures in Urban Dating











{May 23, 2008}   May 22

Dear Blog,

So he told me last night. He doesn’t want to have kids – after 3 1/2 years of thinking he did, he changed his mind. He doesn’t want them so much so that he can’t bring himself to have sex with me for fear that I accidentally might get pregnant. What now? I love him and have invested over 3 years of my very precious, clock- ticking time with him all the while assuming that he wanted to start a family. At 32, I don’t want to be single again and looking. Guys seem to know when you’re “one of those baby crazy women” just looking for the first squirt of sperm to come their way.  And I desperately don’t want to be one of “those”. I thought I’d found him, the him that would see us through thick and thin, all of life. To confound the issue further – he says that he loves me so much that he only wants life to be the two of us. To take care only of each other. Babies not invited. To give him credit, he’s the best, most solid guy I’ve ever been with and I’ve had my share (I won’t go into detail about the 4 previous engagements). And I could see us growing old together – just not alone. But having a family for me isn’t that easy of a decision either. I’m a gypsy at heart and rarely stay put anywhere for any length of time. This, I realize, wouldn’t be the ideal situation to raise a child. Also, I’ve just embarked upon a career that I love. I’m a true “professional” and I’m not so sure I’m ready to give the career world up just as soon as I’ve entered it. But the clock is ticking and like some sort of automaton, I’ve got to obey. I can’t ignore it.

Confused and cried out,

G4 (AKA GoGoGadgetGirl)

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